General FAQs

- Deciding to come
- Eligibility
- Making an appointment
- The counselling sessions
- Our counsellors
- The outcomes
- Costs and payment
- Other

Deciding to come

Is everything confidential?

We will not normally give your name or any information about or from you to anyone outside the organisation. However there are a few exceptional cases where Relate may ethically or legally have to give information to relevant authorities, for example:

• where we are legally compelled to do so
• where there is a duty to the public to disclose
• where disclosure is made at your request or with your consent
• where disclosure is permitted by law and required to protect our interest
• if we believe that someone, especially a child, is at risk of harm

How bad does my problem have to be?

If you feel you need help then it’s available. It is much better to come before the problem gets worse.

Is it too late?

Only you can make this decision. However if you both want to work together it demonstrates that it may be possible for you to develop or reform a relationship.

We think our problem is too trivial

If it is affecting your relationship, please call us. Many clients tell us that they wish they had called us sooner.

I know what the problem is, but I am too embarrassed to talk about it

Our counsellors are highly experienced and trained to deal with any issues you may bring. We understand that you may be nervous and may need time to get to know your counsellor before feeling comfortable discussing some of the issues.

When would I come to Relate?

There are many reasons why people come to us. We help people who have come across issues in their personal relationships and want help to sort things out.

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Eligibility

Can same sex partners attend?

Of course - Relate counselling is available to all.

Is there an age limit?

Relationship counselling is available for all aged 16 and above. There is no upper age limit.

I've never had a relationship, can I still attend?

Yes. If you have never had an intimate, adult, couple relationship you may want to discuss this and have an opportunity to explore why making relationships is a problem for you.

Do I have to be married?

No. Relate Wolverhampton and Dudley provides relationship counselling to anyone, whether or not they are married, currently in a committed relationship, or on their own and whatever their age, race, gender, personal beliefs, sexual orientation or social background.

Do I have to come with my partner?

You may come on your own or as a couple, however relationship counselling tends to be more effective if both partners are involved. Many people do attend alone and still see positive benefits to their relationship. So, if your relationship is in difficulties but your partner doesn’t want to attend counselling, or if you have been though a separation or bereavement and are now adjusting to life on your own, counselling on your own can help you.

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Making an appointment

How do I make an appointment?

Phone 01902 428447 and speak to our Reception Team who will take a few contact details, talk about payments, answer any questions and book you a First Stage appointment with a counsellor usually within two weeks of your call.

How long will I have to wait?

The length of time you wait will depend on your availability and the availability of our counsellors. The wider your availability the shorter your waiting time. Most clients will initially be seen within around 2-3 weeks.

However, it is most important to act early if you are worried about your relationship, rather than put off action until it may be "too late".

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The counselling sessions

What happens when I turn up for an appointment?

A receptionist will meet you and show you to a private waiting area.

What will happen when I come for counselling?

Well, we won’t ask you to lie on a couch and tell us about yourself. Your counsellor will initially give you some information about counselling and confidentiality. They will then help you identify the major concerns within your relationship. They will help you explore your feelings, attitudes and expectations and look at your relationship from a different perspective. Your counsellor will not tell you what to do, nor will they take sides or encourage you to stay in the relationship at all costs. Their aim is to give you the skills and insights to help you and your partner find your own way forward.

Following this appointment and an agreement that counselling will be beneficial, an ongoing appointment will be arranged at a time to suit you and you will be allocated your own counsellor. She/he will help you explore your feelings, attitudes and expectations and look at your relationship from a different perspective. Your counsellor will not tell you what to do or take sides and the aim is to give you the skills and insights to help you and your partner to find your own way forward.

Will I be told what to do?

Not at all. Your counsellor's positive interventions can make a real difference in helping you to sort out your issues, by enabling you to look at the difficulties and possible solutions in detail and from different angles so that you can decide what changes you can and want to make.

How many sessions will I need?

You will see the same counsellor for all your ongoing sessions, although not always the counsellor you saw at the first stage appointment. The session will generally be at the same time each week and will last up to an hour for as many weeks as you and your counsellor consider necessary. We do try to offer those who work shifts appointments at times to suit.

What if I have to cancel?

To help us make good use of opportunities for counselling we have a cancellation policy.
If you give us more than 2 working (Monday - Friday) days' notice we will transfer your payment to your next session. If you give us less than 2 working days notice you will lose your payment and we will ask you to pay for your next appointment.

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Our counsellors

Are all your counsellors trained?

All counsellors either have a Relate recognised qualification in: Relationship & Marital Therapy, Family Counselling, Psycho Sexual Therapy, Counselling of Young People or are in the process of acquiring these qualifications. If you want further information please discuss this with your counsellor.

What if I don’t like my counsellor?

We understand that this sometimes happens. We will always be pleased to arrange for you to see an alternative counsellor.

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The outcomes

Will you want us to stay together?

Relate aim to help you to reach the goals you have. It is a myth that Relate will "make you stay together". We help people make their own decisions and plan their own future. By listening to clients and being objective the counsellor will help you find your own answers. Whether you want to work towards a closer couple relationship or to separate and remain on amicable terms, Relate Counsellor's will aim to help you reach your desired outcome.

Staying together is not always the best option. Sometimes relationships do come to an end and your counsellor will be able to help you keep the lines of communication open through your break-up. It is sometimes as important to be able to face separation in positive way as it is to try and work things out.

Can you help me if I have decided to separate?

Yes, we can support you and your family through separation.

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Costs and payment

How much does counselling cost?

This question is currently being updated

How do I pay?

We accept card payments, cheques and cash. Card payments can be made over the phone.

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Other

What happens if I have a complaint about Relate?

Relate always welcomes feedback and is keen to improve its services. We have a complaints procedure, which aims to make the process straightforward and fair. Should you wish to make a complaint, in the first instance, please raise it with the manager of the service. Your complaint or concerns will be investigated and you will receive a reply within four weeks.

Domestic violence/abuse: what is Relate's view?

Violence and abuse is an issue for many people who come to us for help with their relationship. We know from our experience that in this situation, working with both partners together may not be safe. If this is so, we would help each partner to get individual specialist support from Relate or from another agency.

Other services (e.g. legal, financial or medical)

Relate Wolverhampton and Dudley do not offer legal, financial or medical advice. If you need these or other services not offered by Relate Wolverhampton and Dudley, we may be able to suggest an alternative source of help.

And finally...

Even if you still are unsure about counselling or your questions have not been answered above, please call us in confidence. We feel sure we can help you - and also find a counsellor who is right for you.

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